My new BFF Glengarry Glennis Ross "tagged" me, so now I have to post these 5 Things You Don't Know About Me. Normally I'm not into this kind of internet hoopla, but frankly I probably wouldn't have posted today otherwise, so, here goes:
1. I often go to bed without brushing my teeth and haven't been to the dentist in nearly six years. You see, I feel the same way about brushing that men do about sex; I don't always have the energy at night, but first thing in the morning, LET'S DO IT! It's important for me to note that I don't advocate this kind of horrible oral (hygiene), but thankfully my smile is no worse for the wear. In fact, I just got offered a job as the "Before" mouth in a Nicorette ad. So there.
2. When I was in college I had the following jobs:
1. I often go to bed without brushing my teeth and haven't been to the dentist in nearly six years. You see, I feel the same way about brushing that men do about sex; I don't always have the energy at night, but first thing in the morning, LET'S DO IT! It's important for me to note that I don't advocate this kind of horrible oral (hygiene), but thankfully my smile is no worse for the wear. In fact, I just got offered a job as the "Before" mouth in a Nicorette ad. So there.
2. When I was in college I had the following jobs:
- Night Desk Attendant - Mountain Dew and No-Doz, that's all I want.
- Food Court employee at the Campus Center - Hot in a Hairnet!
- JANITOR - one summer I cleaned the dorms and did housekeeping for the Buffalo Bills players who were at pre-season training. Lots of pizza boxes, dirty socks and unopened condoms.
- Office Assistant - in the Purchasing Dept. on campus, oddly enough. My mother is a purchasing agent. That's also the same department I recently mentioned getting sacked from at Horan Hanley. Hmm... Mommy issues, anyone?
- Waitress - at the deeply mourned Sedona Cafe and the greatest chain restaurant in America, APPLEBEE'S!
3. I played the trumpet for 9 years.
4. I have no tonsils or adenoids. They were removed when I was 16 by my doctor who said, "Your adenoids were blocking your nasal passages 150%." It's a miracle I'm alive! Now I relish the smell of baby diaper - it's a reminder of how far I've come.
5. I broke my left arm as a kid trying to show off on the monkey bars at a friend's house. I was supposed to have been grounded that day, a fact my mother reminded me of all the way to the hospital. As our Chevy Blazer flew over each bump in the road and then came smacking down, my mother said, "Well, it would hurt a lot less if you'd have just done as you were told, Carolyn!"
Which is still applicable to my entire life today, actually. Thanks, Mom. Looks like I could have avoided a few jobs in purchasing if only I had listened...
4. I have no tonsils or adenoids. They were removed when I was 16 by my doctor who said, "Your adenoids were blocking your nasal passages 150%." It's a miracle I'm alive! Now I relish the smell of baby diaper - it's a reminder of how far I've come.
5. I broke my left arm as a kid trying to show off on the monkey bars at a friend's house. I was supposed to have been grounded that day, a fact my mother reminded me of all the way to the hospital. As our Chevy Blazer flew over each bump in the road and then came smacking down, my mother said, "Well, it would hurt a lot less if you'd have just done as you were told, Carolyn!"
Which is still applicable to my entire life today, actually. Thanks, Mom. Looks like I could have avoided a few jobs in purchasing if only I had listened...
