Thursday, June 29, 2006
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
I think it looks great.
I want you all to know that this photo was taken by Leonard Nimoy. I hope that creeps you out sufficiently.
Margaret Dodge (NYC's Hottest Spinster)
Lisa Harmon (Comic Strip)
Claire Wyckoff (HARSH Improv)
Rachael Parenta (Oh, Hello)
...And musical guest, Kimmy Gatewood! (Chicago City Limits)
Carolyn "who needs credits?" Castiglia
Dan Allen (Premium Blend)
Theron Steiner (Chicago & Toronto Sketch Fests)
John Mulaney (Live at Gotham)
Adira Amram (JANE Magazine)
Monday, June 26, 2006
Take a look at what I saw when I went to log in:
The featured profile, "Anything But Cute" is anything but an actual MySpace profile. IT IS AN ADVERTISEMENT DRESSED UP AS A MYSPACE PROFILE. Now, you might say, of course it is - who puts a picture of a car in their profile? (And of course I recognized the slogan "Anything But Cute" from the Dodge Caliber "fairy" ads so widely criticized by the gay community.)
But the problem is not that this is just another of the many ads on MySpace; the problem is that this "profile" is not labeled as an ad. Rather, Dodge is banking on the fact that people (read: teens) won't remember where they've heard that phrase and won't pay attention to the car but look at the cute cartoon pig instead. I admit, the reason I clicked (beyond my shock at the thought that MySpace had completely sold out) is because my friend Jiwon has a similar cute pink cartoon pig that dances around on her profile page.
Now take a look at what you see if you click into the "Anything But Cute" profile:
Pig and Bear. Pig and Bear? What is this, an episode of Nijntje? No - this is a clever way for Dodge to disguise the fact that they are trying to sell cars to kids who like Hello Kitty. (And I should know, since my first car - the one I bought when I was 23 and am still driving - is a purple Dodge Neon.) There are little videos on the site (that I didn't play) and the whole thing is wrapped up in smiles and flowers.
What I think is odd is that I got accused of being a corporation on MySpace not that long ago. My friend John balked at the friend request I sent him from my Pretzel Fan profile in which my hubby and I openly praise (sans pay) Snyder's pretzels, thinking we were in fact Snyder's pretzels. Little did I know his fears would come true in just a few months.
The worst part of all this is, even though I hate what MySpace is doing, I'm not sure I have the balls to delete my profile. Part of me thinks, but where will "the fans" turn? It's not like I have a website or blog that they can turn to.
But I do. And so I have to think seriously about this. Lose all of the 400-something "friends" I've gained - or lose my morals?
No, not that kind of mask, silly! What would be so special about that? I don't report about it every time I see a piece of Balinese dancing happening in the street. Then this blog would be nothing but Balinese dancing entries and everybody knows Balinese dancing is waaaay overrated.
She looked like this:
Hahaha! That takes balls! And a complete and utter disregard for society at large.
Friday, June 23, 2006
Drinking Sprite/Ginger Ale
Drinking Diet Coke
Drinking Regular Coffee
Chugging An Espresso Based Coffee-Drink
Slapping Myself in the Face
Slapping Myself in the Face With the Air Conditioning On
Slapping Myself in the Face With the Air Conditioning On and Eating Espresso Beans
Submitting to Electro-Shock Therapy
I have problems.
Or so poor you kinda hope you'll go to hell because at least then you know the landlord will cover the heat and hot water?
Yeah, me neither.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
It was oh-so-fun and will be super hilarious when complete!
Other than that, Chicks was amazing Tuesday night, we found a place to live and I have another very cool project on the horizon, so... things are great!
Except for my erectile dysfunction. But hey, you can't win 'em all.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Monday, June 19, 2006
MySpaceTom says COLLARS UP, guys!
Friday, June 16, 2006
MySpace is starting to blow some major chunks.
I thought you had to be at least 16 years old to enter the site? (Yes, you do Carolyn.) Then why the hell is the MySpace homepage covered in the bedding of a 4 year old? (Good question, Carolyn.) Thanks.
Here's why: because everything that was ever and will be cool on the internet has been or will be purchased by the man and subsequently destroyed.
Napster, Friendster, Flickr, MySpace...
Blogger?... (Thank God for Google - though I suppose they are the Starbucks of the Internet. But anyone who knows me knows I love me a grande vanilla latte.)
I read a short article in the AM New York today about the government's role in regulating the internet. Here's a key excerpt:
On one side are broadband operators, such as AT&T and Verizon, which want to establish a tiered payment system that charges content providers extra fees for sending larger files. The telecoms say their networks are being burdened by the explosion of video and audio downloads.
On the other side, companies such as Microsoft, Google and eBay argue that creating fast lanes and slow lanes will kill the open and democratic nature of the Internet, which is what made it so interesting in the first place.
The concept at issue is called "Net neutrality" -- meaning the Internet would remain a level playing field for the biggest media conglomerate and the smallest blogger. The idea is the Web should stay free from any interference from the companies that own the wires over which information travels.
One advocate of Net neutrality imagined that the Internet would become more like cable TV, which has set channels, as opposed to today's free-for-all.
"This is not a geek thing; this is actually very much about how our children will experience the Internet," said Siva Vaidhyanathan, a communications professor at New York University and an advocate for Net neutrality. "For good or bad or for better or worse, that messy, loud, dangerous and often naked experience we call the Internet could become a much more structured and commercially based version."
I believe the word is, "BOO!"
I guess I'm too old for MySpace, anyway. I'm gonna hang on for now, because like Lianne, I have FOMS (Fear of Missing Something). But if I log on and see a Pirates of the Carribean skin on the home page, I am so out of there.
- Yo Grandma is so old, dinosaurs ask her what life was like before they were born!
- Yo Grandma is so fat, she don't need a heatin' pad to cure her arthritis - she just rests her upper arm flab on her elbow joint!
- Yo Grandma is so dumb, she makes people with Alzheimer's look smart!
- Yo Grandma is so smelly, she makes "hospital" seem like the latest scent from Yankee Candle!
- Yo Grandma is so hairy, you could brush your teeth with her mole!
- Yo Grandma is so mean, she makes Hitler look like Hello Kitty!
- Yo Grandma is so broke, she makes a leaky faucet look like a Brita filter!
- Yo Grandma is so frail, she makes Kate Moss look like Carolyn Castiglia!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Here's a picture of me at Saturday's show in Philly with some people who enjoyed me so much they wanted to take me home as a souvenir. I'd rather not mention the venue's name, but if you really want to know, here are some clues:
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Ladies, WHAT IS WITH ALL THE PARASOLS? I just took this picture in front of 1633 Broadway:
STOP THE INSANITY!!!
If you people don't stop it with the um-ber-ellas I'm gonna drop this dumbbell on my head. Don't test me - I'LL DO IT.
Girls, if you're truly concerned that the one ray of sunshine hitting you for .025 seconds as you flit between the shadow of the Lehman Brothers building to the shadow of the Morgan Stanley building is going to destroy your precious (and pricey) complexion, why not try one of these high tech gadgets built for the new millennium?
This may look like your average, everyday STRAW HAT. But notice the antennae. They function as a sort of universal current source, powering your cell phone, Blackberry, Treo, laptop, TiVo, Rabbit, you name it.
I understand that at first glance this seems to merely be SUNBLOCK. However, look carefully at the notches on the side of the bottle. Thanks to retractable blades, these can be used as a saw (should you need to cut off an assailant's hand as they grab your parasol and begin to beat you over the head with it.)
To the untrained eye, these may appear to be regular old SUNGLASSES. But no. These shades are an eye-protectant and futuristic communication device in one. Wearing these will allow you to instantly contact the FBI should an emergency arise. (You know, in case someone blows your cover and admits that your real name is not Baroness Von Haughtypants. That's a good one, though.)
And don't forget, using any of the above products combined is a great way to create a fresh, fashion-forward look.
I hope this helps!
Adieu, mes amis. Toodaloo!
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Of course it is.
And if you believe that, you should see the Excel spreadsheet I'm building!
Monday, June 12, 2006
Friday, June 09, 2006
I'll take anything that prevents me from using Excel for $500, Alex.
OH! IT'S A DAILY DOUBLE!
Answer: It's the show that you should go see tonight.
YES! YOU WIN $1,000!
That ought to buy you at least two beers.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
There's only one thing that could keep Blogger down for almost an entire day.
Damn you, Satan! Damn you to heaven!
See, since nothing catastrophic happened on 666, I think Satan figured he would take the ultimate revenge by shutting down the world's collective journal:
"Oh, oh, it's my big day and no one's blowing anything up? No natural disasters? No murderous rampage? I've waited 1,000 years for this day to come around again and what do I get? Nothing. Not even a new Marilyn Manson record. Oh - don't even mention that awful movie to me. What?... Please! That book is not even worth discussing. In fact, it offends me when people call Ann Coulter Satan. I'm not that bad."