45for45 Challenge: Days 31 & 32

A word on vitality, from Martha Graham:

"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. ... No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others."



I took Day 31 off. It just seems easier to workout every other day now, both physically and in terms of scheduling. But if I weren't aiming to do every day, I wouldn't be hitting every other day. Besides, my friend Jen Dziura told me that muscles only build while at rest. So there.

I'm so much stronger than I was when I started this project just about a month ago, it's really incredible. It's funny, tho, as my strength is building, my balance is off. I guess you can't have everything all at once, until you suddenly do. It's like mastering stand-up. At first you're so bad you don't even know how bad you are. And then you get better and you can see how far you have to go. I feel so much more vital - both on and off stage - than I did a year ago. Somehow miraculously I continued to perform while grieving for my Dad and watching my marriage unravel, but I was just going through the motions. Looking back, I'm so glad I didn't take a break, despite what I was going through, because the regularity of performing - having something to focus on and look forward to - those are the things that save you in times of trouble.

My friend Adrienne Iapalucci is having a lovely and well-deserved moment in the sun right now, having been chosen as an opening act for the New York Comedy Festival. In this article in the Times, she talks about how she got in a car accident and gained 100 pounds. But look at her, she's gorgeous, she lost all that weight - and her Dad, too. And she never quit. Sometime last year, she saw me at a show and said, "I'm so glad you didn't quit, even tho you have a kid, cuz you're so funny." That really meant a lot to me. I think about it every time I feel like maybe it's time to throw in the towel on the old clowning life.

So, here's to anyone out there, worried that they have to quit pursuing their dreams. Don't quit. Take care of yourself. Get your life right. But don't quit. Keep your heart pure and your eye on the prize. I don't know if you'll get there, and I don't know if I'll get there. I guess it depends on where "there" is. But I know ain't nobody goin' nowhere if they quit tryin'.

Namaste.

Know Your Poo: There's an app for that.

Today is my friend Chef April Neujean's birthday, and given that she's into all-natural eating, it seems appropriate to embed here a video about poo, in her honor.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EU_0laWeLU&feature=player_embedded

After all, April is the person who told me that healthy adults should poop three times a day. I'm not so sure healthy adults should take their poo to work with them, but to each his own. It's difficult to make a poo at work. Here's to hoping your office has a stand-alone handicapped bathroom! (I mean, anybody who can't drop a much-needed deuce is at a definite handicap.)

And while we're on the subject, here's an actual conversation I had with my daughter just last week about the number 2.

Adriana: Mommy, come here!

Me: What's the matter?

Adriana: I pooped my pants.

Me: No. No! You did not just poop your pants.

Adriana: Yes, I did.

Me: I can't even submit for a theatre festival without you pooping your pants? (I'd like to nominate that sentence as the most ridiculous/worst thing ever said.)

Lather, rinse, repeat. That's right, she number 2'd in her drawers twice in one night. Lesson? Four-year-olds should not eat tuna fish. (YOU'RE WELCOME.)

Disclosure: This video was sent to me by AvatarLabs to promote their iPhone app The Poo Logs based on the book, "What's Your Poo Telling You?" by Josh Richman and Dr. Anish Sheth. They will be sending me a free copy of the book, "What's My Pee Telling Me?" (You know I'm a sucker for rhyme.)

45for45 Challenge: Days 27-30

Two days off, two days on. But today I raked leaves in addition to doing yoga, so that counts for something, right?

And because I'm tired and don't feel like typing anymore, I'll leave you with this video, which gives new meaning to the phrase downward-facing dog:



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouccHJYDP7I

The Widow and The Divorcee, Ep. 547

Actual conversation I had with my mother after she found a link on Facebook to this article in the New York Post, wherein I talk about having been involved in a threesome.

Widow: What is a menage-a-trois?

Divorcee: If you don't know, I don't want to tell you.

Widow: Oh, I know.

Divorcee: I knew you'd read that article. I come up all the time in your feed. You have like 10 friends and I'm very active on Facebook.

Widow: Yeah, but I hid you.

Divorcee: What?! You HID me?! You have 10 Facebook friends and you hid your daughter???

Widow: Well, you take up too much space. So did you really do that while you were married?

Divorcee: Yes.

Widow: Carolyn, you let your husband have sex with someone else?!

Divorcee: No. No. They did not have intercourse. Although I sort of wish they did because I would have divorced him sooner.

Widow: Who was it?

Divorcee: I can't say.

Widow: Why?

Divorcee: Because I won't.

Widow: Because I know him? Her?

Divorcee: The subject is closed.

Widow: So it was just an idea that you had that didn't really pan out.

Divorcee: Well, I think that's pretty clearly implied in my quote. But I also had another one in high school the first time I got high, if that's any consolation.

Fin

45for45 Challenge: Days 24-26

I took Monday off. I just felt really tired and busy and blah blah blah. It does feel better to workout after a day off, though, so yesterday was great. Today I was sore going through the poses, but also the discipline of daily practice makes balancing easier for sure. Not only did I do two perfect half-moon poses, I also did two perfect dancer poses.

Yep, that's me, standing at the foot of the ocean in my living room.

I think I'm gonna add up all the days I've taken off (I wanna say 5 so far? But it's probably more like 7... oops) and add them on to the end of the challenge. The challenge after the challenge will be not only to keep the exercise going, but to step it up a notch. Oh, hip-hop class at NYSC, I hear you call my name and it feels like home. Just like a prayer (pose). YOGA JOKES!

45for45 Challenge: Days 21-23

Yoga, yoga, yoga! Adriana did yoga with me yesterday, and she was ace at it, of course. If you follow my blog, you know she's a natural talent when it comes to dance, so it's no surprise that she'd be able to pick up yoga instantly. She's a major help, too, because I can't get into a full bow pose unless she hands me my left ankle.

Lemme see you do it!

I'm proud to announce that today I did two perfect half-moon poses, one on each side. I held them as long as Eva does on the DVD and didn't even so much as wobble. Psyched!

Without getting too much into the emotional side of things, I'll say that there is one moment on the DVD when Eva talks about feeling like a superhero flying through the air to save someone, and every time she says that I think about how I'm saving myself.

Namaste.

45for45 Challenge: Days 17-20

I fell off the wagon this week a bit. I was babysitting and taking care of friends and performing non-stop and traveling, what can I say? Today is Day 20 and I just did yoga and it was brilliant. It's kind of nice to rest and then see what your body can do when it's fully recovered. Just a thought.

This is a picture of me taken about 10 days ago or so in (a way over-extended) half-moon pose.



I had to use the 10 second timer on my camera to make this happen, so I got a little excited.

I'm going to bed.

Life is around you and in you.

Namaste.